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I would like to get something off my chest!
16. November 2007 - 18:52
Over a year and 4-6 months ago I played Q3, but I ended up destroying my body because I had a huge drinking and drug useage problem! From what other people say, I was a pretty edgy person who was cruel to others. So I am using this thread to get this off my chest!
Drugs have a way of controlling a person mind to where they arent who they used to be, and I should have never let my own problems allow me to be weak enough to do these highly addictive drugs! I take full responsibility for my actions!
I would like to say I am very sorry Budman for being how I was, drinking all the time and doing drugs while I was in PHC, I didn't mean to make you nor the clan to look bad!
When I was in FTF I started using heavier drugs, and my temper grew, and my mind created illusions and deceptions, so I ended up changing even more, so to the first FTF members who once knew me, I am very sorry for making the clan and you guys look bad also!
If I have said anything to harm any of you or anyone else for that matter in the whole E+ community, I am very sorry! I do not want pity, or for someone to feel sorry for me, I just want others to know the truth, and to obtain forgivness for what I said, and did, I don't remember those days, but someone did the other day, so I am here!
I am sorry everyone, and I hope no one makes the same mistake I made, because laying in the bed for many months having seizures, all your joints, and organs constantly hurting, you cant sleep, cant eat, and the depression is enough to kill you mentally, and all you wish for is death, it's unbearable ... so unbearable!
Again, I am sorry everyone for anything I have caused or said to hurt anyone, and I must remain away until I am in better shape, because 6-8 months is just the beginning of recovery!
Everyone take care!
--Death
16. November 2007 - 19:32
#1
I would like to get something off my chest!
Hi Death,
I can relate to most of the points you mentioned, since I have been through a sort of similar thing in the past. The most important thing is that you have actually realised what was going wrong and corrected it. It's quite easy to get stuck in a neverending downward spiral until you mentally and physically crash. However, I wish you the best of luck for the future dude.
16. November 2007 - 20:01
#2
I would like to get something off my chest!
drugs and alcohol are NEVER the right way.
16. November 2007 - 20:23
#3
I would like to get something off my chest!
i agree with reno.
Good luck, hope you heal well.
16. November 2007 - 20:39
#4
I would like to get something off my chest!
good for you death! hope you enjoy all you can in your new world...
Keep focused and you become a winner.
if you CHOOSE to go back on that road, then your on a highway to hell baby!!
Trust me i been there and done that shit, but luckily i realised i had to make a choice and did it in enough time to keep my life, and now im a winner ooohhh yeeeeaaahh!!!!!!.
CHOOSE wisely.. 
i would say good luck but lucks got nothing to do with it.
calm waters.
16. November 2007 - 23:38
#5
I would like to get something off my chest!
hmm then welcome to the club of broad-minded. That what the substance did to me anyway.
I feel compassion for you. I can also relate to most things that you been through. Its not fun. All you can hope is to make through the day. And pray the next day isnt gonna be as harsh as yesterday
17. November 2007 - 10:59
#7
I would like to get something off my chest!
Well done. 
Stay strong and stay hopeful. Maybe you can change your name to something positive and hopeful (q3 Name ofc) like The Reborn or just Reborn, anyway. Take care.
Regards
17. November 2007 - 11:37
#8
I would like to get something off my chest!
I do not know why but I believe you will be capable of being recovered again soon (I mean getting better) .Just use your will power 
17. November 2007 - 17:16
#9
I would like to get something off my chest!
I guess some know this things, but i doubt that lot have done those harder shit he talks about..
For me i can just say i can just imagine what you've gone through...to be honest just in this minute i'm somehow like you, only not that worse. It's really hard to turn back.
Best wishes and regards,
Absti
:::
I HATE ARSENAL AND TOTTENHAM!!!!!!11
:::
move > camp
:!: Movie
Click
17. November 2007 - 18:31
#10
I would like to get something off my chest!
Just Stay strong and think that those things will have u death or u will have a discapacity of something ( like brain damage ) . Great Choice of left those drugs bro, I haven't been in that situation but I see examples from my friends and family and They are like 40 years old and their life is a total mess. So keep up the faith and farewell in ur recover ...peace...
wrote:Sex is a sensation caused by temptation of a guy sticking his location into a girl's destination to increase the population of the next generation. Do you understand my explanation or do you need a demonstration?...peace...
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I greatly appreciate everyones replies, I wish I was alone with my experience because I wish none of you went through the same situation, but it does feel good to get comfort from you all, and advice, and I appreciate it more than you know! Thank you all!
--Death