Well i was reading some interesting article about relations with ppl, and i found many interesting points that can be consider here to get a better atmosphere. hope can be useful for all.

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Practical hints for negotiations and successful interaction with other people:

Avoid situations where both parties want (or are bent) to win by making sure in advance that there is a conducive atmosphere for the conversation.

Do not pretend, be the way you are, not the way you want to be seen. Otherwise you will not appear natural which will make it hard to build up affinity. Authenticity is the key.

Be critical with yourself. Be true to yourself and your character. Reflect yourself and do not live a superficial life. You will thus be able to develop a sensitivity for what is going on around you.

Accept that human beings are self-centered by nature. This helps you to respect opinions and feelings of others.

Approach other people with a receptive and open mind. Reduce obstacles by putting yourself in their position when there is disagreement.

Avoid judging the opinions of others, accept them as suggestions.

Start your conversation with something positive. Then, however, get straight to the point and the intended purpose of the conversation.

Let others know right from the beginning that they can benefit from this negotiation by describing the positive results to them.

Do not insist on your individual plans but demonstrate that you are sincerely interested in a solution that meets the expectations of both sides.

Make concessions in some areas. However, find out in advance to what extent such concessions could compromise your goals.

Listen closely and, by asking questions on what others are saying, show them what you have learnt from their comments or objections.

Manage your negotiations with emotional intelligence

Frequently, disagreement in conversations leads to tension on the interpersonal level. Recognizing such conflicts while they are emerging will enable you to make an intervention and to ultimately succeed in the negotiation.

In order to avoid ending up in an emotional „conversation bottleneck“, you should keep an eye on the communicative behavior of the other person. He or she will unconsciously inform you, whether they are happy with the course of the conversation or not.

If you want to remain in control in a conversation, you must avoid being unconsciously influenced by their communication behavior. Be aware of their tone of voice, expression and body language.

The following list names but a few examples of communication behavior from a very broad and diverse range. These are frequent ones, however, and therefore you should pay special attention to them. Test out thoroughly, in which of the cases your reaction would be appropriate or where you could correct your patterns of communication behavior.

Rude, impolite: Remain polite but determined. Ignore gaffes made by others.

Nervous, impatient: Stay calm. React quickly. Do not try to calm them down, it might easily make them aggressive.

Cumbersome, thoughtful: Do not insist, explain thoroughly. Give them time to think.

Cool, polite: Give them a feeling of esteem, ask them for their opinion, restrain yourself.

Kind, open for contact: Make use of a conducive negotiation situation, but do not become too intimate.

Quiet, hesitant: Use question and pause techniques, but avoid a questioning situation, do not silence them with a flood of words.

Critical, suspicious: Work with proven facts, use a good rationale, check whether they are still with you from time to time.

Talkative, chatty: Interrupt in a friendly way, do not become impatient, try to puzzle them.

Insecure, indecisive: Do not insist, give detailed explanations of advantages and benefits, take the initiative.

Arrogant, boastful: Be very polite and kind, avoid opposition, pay compliments.

Pedantic, narrow-minded: Immediately correct everything that has remained unclear, be careful with compliments, take these people very seriously.

... and finally for a personal remark

That is all very well in theory - you might say - and: yes, it requires frequent and active use in day-to-day situations. This means: practice, practice, practice. Communication can be trained. Continue enlarging your store of knowledge from experience. Enhance your personality in the interaction with others. Avoid dogmatic methods and keep away from manipulative conversation techniques. Those who know how to convince others do not need manipulation. Those who have the art of motivating others are certain to be successful in negotiations and conversations.

Wishing you a lot of fun and success.

Sincerely, Karl Heinz Lorenz

The Author:

Karl Heinz Lorenz, 38, graduated in Business Administration from Mannheim Berufsakademie in 1988 and is one of two partners in LORENZ-SEMINARE Personality- & Competence-Training, Munich.

www.lorenz-seminare.de
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