Hehheh. Nice, Neo. Good boy. I think the last one is about Paris Hilton/Nicole Richie.

@ Mad lol. That "ty kupo" fact is interesting. I bet Plinko will not be saying Kupo much longer. Muahahaaa!

17. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? toothpicks?

24. As income tax time approaches, did you ever notices: When you put the two words "The" and "IRS"together it spells "THEIRS"?

hahaha lmao Nice Cryptor

As I prepare to meet with my X today,
I found the following to be appropriate for the day.

Good morning and welcome to the Saturday snickers....

Expressions for Women on High Stress Days.

1. You - Off my planet.
2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?
3. Well, this day was a total waste of makeup.
4. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
5. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?
†6. I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood
for 30 years.
7. Allow me to introduce my selves.
†8. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
9. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you
missed.
10. I'm just working here until a good fast-food job
opens up.
11. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
12. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you
realize you weren't asleep.
13. I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil
one.
14. How many times do I have to flush before you go
away?
15. I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?
16. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.
17. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #2?
18. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
19. Chaos, panic, and disorder-my work here is done.
20. Earth is full. Go home.
21. Is it time for your medication or mine?
22. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
23. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.

I have hundreds of these,they we're sent to me
vie...e mail over the course of time. I like to share.

And now the Saturday Snickers....

The Rules of Being A Guy...
>>
>> 1. Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally
>>killed and
>>eaten by his fellow partygoers.
>>
>>2. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
>>
>>3. It is ok for a man to cry under the following circumstances:
>> a. When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
>> b. The moment Salma Hayek prematurely stops unbuttoning her
>>blouse.
>> c. After wrecking your boss' Ferrari.
>> d. One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into The Crying Game.
>>
>>4. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a
>>friend out of jail
>>within 12 hours.
>>
>>5. Acceptable excuse for not helping a friend move
>> a. Your legs have been severed in a freak threshing accident.
>> b. You'd rather stay home and watch speed buggy reruns.
>>
>>6. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off
>>limits
>>forever, unless you actually marry her.
>>
>>7. The minimum amount of time you have to wait for a guy who's
>>running late is 5
>>minutes. Maximum waiting time: 6 minutes. For a girl, you have to
>>wait 10
>>minutes for every point of hotness she scores on the classic 1-10
>>scale.
>>
>>8. Bitching about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is
>>forbidden. Gripe at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
>>
>>9. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for
>>another man. (In
>>fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional.)
>>
>>10. On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not
>>the weakest.
>>
>>11. While your girlfriend must bond with your buddies' girlfriends
>>within 30
>>minutes of meeting them, you are not required to make nice with her
>>gal pals'
>>significant other -- low level sports bonding is all the law
>>requires (sorry
>>ladies, it's called a double standard because it's twice as true).
>>
>>12. Unless you have signed a lucrative endorsement contract, do not
>>appear in public wearing more than one Nike swoosh.
>>
>>
>>13. When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you
>>may
>>always ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask
>>who's
>>playing.
>>
>>14. You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have made
>>love. If you
>>trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent
>>entertainment, she's
>>officially your girlfriend.
>>
>>15. It is permissible to guzzle a fruity chick drink only when
>>you're
>>sunning on a tropical beach....and it's delivered by a topless
>>supermodel...and it's free.
>>
>>16. Only in situations of Mortal and/or Ass peril are you allowed
>>to kick
>>another guy in the groin.
>>
>>17. Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.
>>
>>18. Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
>>
>>19. If a man's zipper is down, that's his problem---you didn't see
>>nothin'.
>>
>>20. Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as
>>spies until
>>they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to pick a
>>buffalo wing
>>clean.
>>
>>21. You must offer heartfelt and public condolences over the death
>>of a
>>girlfriend's cat, even if it was you who secretly set it on fire
>>and
>>threw it into a ceiling fan.
>>
>>22. A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must
>>remain sober
>>enough to fight.
>>
>>23. Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of
>>pizza, but
>>not both. That's just plain mean.
>>
>>24. If you complement a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be
>>talking
>>about his choice of beer.
>>
>>25. Never join your girlfriend or wife in dissing a buddy of yours,
>>except if she's withholding sex pending your response.
>>
>>26. Phrases that may not be uttered to another man while lifting
>>weights:
>> a. Yeah, baby! Push it!
>> b. C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
>> c. Another set and we can hit the showers!
>> d. Nice buns, are you a Sagittarius?
>>
>>27. Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal
>>footing: both
>>urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an
>>almost
>>imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
>>
>>28. Never allow a conversation with a woman to go on longer than
>>you are able to
>>have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone; Hang up if
>>necessary.
>>
>>29. When a buddy is trying to hook up, you may sabotage him only in
>>a
>>manner that gives you no chance of getting a girl either.
>>
>>30. You cannot rat out a coworker who shows up at work with a
>>massive
>>hangover. You may however, hide the aspirin, smear his chair with
>>limburger cheese, turn the brightness dial all the way down so he
>>thinks his
>>monitor is broken, and have him paged over the loudspeaker every
>>seven minutes.

rofl!